Random Thoughts (for Which We Should Blame the Tea Party or Something)

1. Stores which cater to women should provide spaces for men. And when I say ‘should’ I simply mean, it would be great marketing. “We have a den complete with a TV and couches for your husband to relax while you shop. That way you don’t have to hurry and he is no hurry!” The fact that no store – that I know of – has done this, is proof of the demise of our society.

2. A lot of people talk about how people like me are scared to live downtown and shop downtown, etc. Well, we have our own dangers here.  Every time I go into the second-hand bookstore down by the Galleria, they take my money while smiling at me. Danger is everywhere.

3. I am tired of this abnormal cold down here in Alabama. I thought about blaming God but decided it was more chic’ to blame Sarah Plain. But then I thought, “All the cool kids are doing that. I’ll blame Rush Limbaugh.” But then I thought, “That is soooo 1995. I’ll blame Mark Levin.” And then I went to Glen Beck’s website…site? Like a gun site? And all of a sudden I wanted to harm people. It was weird.”

4. First they blame Plain for the Tucson shooting, then the Gun (bullets are always ignored and get away scot free), then Tea Parties (my daughter was horrified) and now Heavy Metal.  But I have a theory. Has anyone asked if he used AT&T’s wireless internet service. That could put a guy over the edge.

5. Wait. There is a movie coming out about Jason Bieber. How long could this movie be?

6. So Sarah Palin caused the Tuscon shooting and global warming caused the rise and fall of the Roman Empire. I want you all to remember this. This is why I am not a liberal and never could be. Liberals say things they do not believe and then ridicule you for not believing it.

7. If they do bring back the Wooly Mammoth, expect it have a lawyer and sue Fox News for it’s previous extinction.

8. My first generation iPhone is not working all that well. In fact, it is dying on me. It freezes up and does not receive calls and sometimes I get voice mails days later if at all. All of this is good preparation for an iPhone 4.

9. If Cam Newton’s father was at the BCS National Champioship game then we know who to blame, don’t we? Conservative talk radio.

10. I am so tired of hearing about everyone’s troubles, I have not had bacon in days.

3 thoughts on “Random Thoughts (for Which We Should Blame the Tea Party or Something)

  1. sean January 15, 2011 / 7:24 pm

    i had bacon today. you should try it…it will make you feel better.

  2. Matt Blick January 15, 2011 / 10:27 pm

    Oh man I feel so guilty – I had TWO bacon sandwiches today. If only I'd know…BTW the answer to 5) is – too long

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