1. I can’t wait till winter.
2. I don’t appreciate all these churches doing VBS on the same week. Who is going to watch our kids on the mornings when there are no VBS’s going?
3. When I enter my calories into my Lose It! app, I immediately get hungry.
4. Me amo mojitos.
5. Wait, someone needs to tell me again why I’m not supposed to like Palin? I can never remember.
6. I’m not sure why, but my pride swelled for Birmingham when I read the story about a wild black bear being found in town.
7. Remember the good ole days, when we had rain?
8. I only drink free range mojitos.
9. I can’t believe Oprah quit doing the whole book club thing right before the release of my book. The luck, huh?
10. If I ever own a professional ball club here in Birmingham, I’m calling ’em the freaking “Wild Black Bears.”
1. Dale Murphy is following me on twitter. He sent me a message to let me know, you know, cause we are friends. On twitter, but still.
2. Wal-Mart’s bacon is not all that good. This is in comparison to other bacon. Compared to every other food it still rules.
3. A friend asked me if I would remember them when I make it big and my book is picked to be part of Oprah’s book club. I just can’t remember that friend’s name.
4. I dreamed about Van Halen the other night. Diamond Dave offered me hors d’oeuvres. Great dream.
5. I can’t believe Dale Murphy is not in the Hall of Fame. I also cannot believe they are making another Pirates of the Caribbean movie. No justice in this world.
6. So, the Rapture is happening on Saturday. What do you wear for such an event?
7. I’m pretty excited about the check coming from my cousin, Fjrfbebverkb in Holland. Thankfully, all I had to do was give him my SS#.
8. If everyone is a missionary, how come plumbers never speak at missions conferences?
9. My 2 year old wakes up everyone around 6:15 screaming “MAAAAAHHHHMEEEEE!” As if his getting out of the crib is a matter of life and death. My wife takes it personally.
10. I know you don’t think the stuff that happened in the movie Signs could be real. But you need to know we have glasses of water everywhere in our house.
1. *I* only eat free-range Peeps.
2. I know the conventional wisdom is to not throw stones in glass houses but you may not want to live in one either, what with the lack of privacy and all. And all the stones being thrown around.
3. Two words: Bacon Jerky.
4. For some reason my wife refuses to dress up like Princess Leia…now OR at Halloween.
5. Well, now I am *really* confused on what the Nobel Peace Prize means.
6. I have a hatchet.
7. Is it bad parenting to call your child ‘Darth Knox’? Hypothetically speaking, of course.
8. I don’t have any money nor prospects for any, so my wife must’ve married me for my body.
9. Do you think Jimmy Carter avoids the mall around Easter?
10. Glad I was able to ease the 8 year old mind of my daughter. “No one *really* died in that light saber battle between Obi Wan Kenobi and Darth Vader?”
1. Have I mentioned there is a new Radiohead album coming this Saturday?
2. Have I mentioned how much I like bacon?
3. My second grade daughter made me and the wife valentines all by herself. You might as well not offer money for mine. No matter the amount, I wouldn’t take it.
4. No matter how hard I try, I cannot get into Mumford &Sons or the Avett Brothers.
5. I just started Housekeeping by Marilynne Robinson and cannot stop thinking about it.
1. Some memories are like money found in the pocket of a coat unworn for many warm months.
2. No comment from Mary Jo Kopechne on this.
3. When I was younger I wanted to look into theology at the expense of everything but as I’ve gotten older I find myself wanting to look through theology so I can actually see everything.
4. I’m holding out for CSI: Toldeo and Law & Order: Funeral Procession Officers.
5. The computer that decides the BCS rankings must be a PC.
6. I have trouble remembering what I wear from day to day. And this is bad when you teach teenagers. So I used to be worried that I would wear the same thing two days in a row. But then I remembered I teach at a private school. A classical school even. Where they wear uniforms. I now no longer worry about this.
7. We live in a world in which young people want to change the world but do not want to change diapers.
8. Pork product.
9. Not many songs better than this.
10. Losing 20 lbs. has rendered all of my shirts ‘puffy‘.